Katie and the Golden Spurtle
In true school report style read Katie's account on her nerve-wracking entry into the World Porridge Making Championships:
I’ve had at least 350 or so chances to devise and perfect a potentially award-winning recipe, since last year when I decided (with a little nudging) to enter the Golden Spurtle World Porridge Making Championship. As an all-year-round porridge-eater you’d think I had plenty of time to prepare myself and feel confident – never having entered such a contest before. Little did I realise quite how nervous I would be as the number of breakfasts in which to practise dwindled to zero and it was time to journey north, magic porridge pot, wooden spoon (as I was yet to graduate to a spurtle) and ingredients in hand.
It’s all well and good to try things out at home. A spoonful of spice here, a handful of toasted seeds there. And for your loved ones to willingly sample relentless erratic experiments. But to ‘perform’ one’s usually private porridge-making to a packed village hall and on camera takes some courage. I had not anticipated the fear in presenting three bowls of my own Speciality Porridge recipe to a panel of white-smocked professional chefs with highly discerning taste-buds and strong opinions about oatmeal. But that was the fabulously ridiculous part of it – fifteen adults, totally focused on making the perfect porridge to impress these judges. All concentrated diligently on continuously stirring their concoctions, adding just the right amount of and right kind of water (some brought a supply from their own private boar hole). The judges also quizzed each of us about the ingredients we were using and where we had sourced them; the organic Da Mhile Whisky I used particularly intrigued them. This was coupled with a few hundred people to make up an audience that was gripped by the unexpected spectacle. It made for quite an intense experience. Not to mention the whisky sampling in between and admittedly during the heats.
I looked at the recipes of the previous winners of the Speciality Porridge category and deliberated about what the judges might favour – chocolate, spicy apple, whipped cream, ice cream, or something savoury like wild mushrooms, smoked haddock and vodka perhaps. In the end I decided to ignore the judges and to make something I would eat; something organic, a bit fruity and nutty and naturally sweet. Somehow my final recipe embraced the idea of ‘world’ porridge perhaps a bit more than I would have liked as it included dried peaches and macadamia nuts from Australia and ground cardamom from Sri Lanka. From closer to home there was a hint of flavour from bay leaves from my allotment. I had wanted to stew plums from the tree on my plot but the rooks stole them all! Next year…
And there was even more excitement on the day. A glimpse of Miss Scotland with her tartan sash and cascading blonde hair; marching along behind the pipe band in a procession to the Village Hall. The Traditional Toast to the Porridge with a dram of whisky. The fizzle of my fellow contestants’ nerves backstage as we waited for our heat and as other contestants’ secret ingredients were revealed. The fabulous troop of washing-up ladies who cleaned our pans and refilled the tea urns and baskets of shortbread. I also had the chance to sample of each contestant’s entry – porridge brûlée, porridge soaked in stout, with rhubarb, with chocolate and the winning flavour of marzipan. As I delighted in all the delicious porridges I thought of how amazing it would be if every child, and indeed person, in the country could start each day with a bowl of porridge…
Here is my recipe – serves 3:
The night before…
Chop about four or five dried peaches and soak them in a tablespoon of organic Da Mhile single grain whisky.
Measure out the oatmeal in a cup. Not filling the cup quite to the top I used three quarters medium and one quarter of course oatmeal for a more nutty texture.
Finely shave a small handful of macadamia nuts into the oatmeal.
Add a teaspoon of apple powder.
Add half a teaspoon of cardamom powder.
Add a bay leaf per portion.
Soak the oatmeal mix in slightly warm water 1-1, stir, cover and leave to soak overnight.
On the day…
Stew the dried peaches with a chopped Red William pear and a small amount of water in a pan – probably for about 5 to 8 minutes (keep some aside for a garnish).
Chop a small handful of macadamia nuts and lightly toast.
Once the stewed fruits are soft add the soaked oats to the pan.
Cook the porridge, stirring gently and adding recently boiled water to keep the consistency you want. This can take up to 5 minutes.
When ready remove the bay leaves.
Serve in a bowl with a dash of milk – cow or soya – and garnish with toasted macadamia pieces, the saved stewed fruits and a bay leaf per bowl.
All organic of course!
